DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek: Deep Space Nine characters are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc and Viacom. The story contents are the creation and property of C. Zdroj and are copyright (c) 2003 by C. Zdroj. This story is Rated NC-17.

WARNING: This is a slash story, containing explicit male/male sex (also changeling/Ferengi sex, for that matter). If such material bothers you, or if you are under 18 years of age, please seek more suitable reading material elsewhere.

Getting the Goods
by C. Zdroj

Chronology Note: This story is set roughly some time during ST:DS9's first three seasons.


Odo straightened abruptly at the sound of the doors hissing open. He scowled at the interruption to his monthly unannounced search of Quark's rooms. Damn! The little troll would have to come back before he'd completed his work.  Never given to needless panic, however, the constable took in his immediate surroundings at a glance. Quark's bedroom was an ideal hiding place for a shapeshifter, littered with all manner of shiny trinkets, vulgar objets d'art, and a downright voluptuous excess of bedding. Hmmmm ... Odo considered his options for a half-second, noting the texture and color of the items on the bed. Within an eye-blink he transformed himself into a pillow of green silk and reposed himself to wait.

Perhaps, he reflected, this would not be all bad. Maybe he would get lucky and Quark would take a com-call in his bedroom from one of the Orion Syndicate contacts that Odo knew he had, but had yet to prove the existence of. He smiled inwardly. If Quark attempted to reach any such contact now, Odo would have the greedy little Ferengi right where he wanted him. The sentient pillow on Quark's bed found it hard to suppress a shiver of anticipation as the barkeeper entered the room.

Quark's footsteps came stumping agitatedly through the doorway. For some moments Odo could hear him pacing about the small space.

"Fee-males!" Quark growled at last. "Nothing but trouble ... ask a Dabo girl for a little favor and she demands a raise. That'll be the day, when I pay my help extra latinum for routine sexual ... Hmmmm ..."

Quark stopped muttering for a moment, surveying the contents of his bed. Pillow-Odo couldn't see the Ferengi in his present form, having neglected to fashion even simple eye-structures, but the abrupt silence made him freeze inwardly, causing a sensation somewhat akin to holding one's breath. Pillow-Odo, of course, had no need to breathe.

"Guess if you want anything done right, you have to do it yourself," said Quark sardonically. And with that, the Ferengi began to strip himself. Again, Odo couldn't see this, but he could clearly hear the sounds of Quark peeling off and flinging away his clothing. There was some rattling as Quark rummaged through a bed-side drawer, finally extracting something. Despite himself, Odo found his curiosity roused. What the hell was Quark up to now? Probably something illegal ...

A moment later, Quark flung his naked self on the bed, and Pillow-Odo heard the electronic hum of some small device--soon accompanied by protracted moans of delight from the Ferengi. Odo very nearly recoiled in disgust. He didn't need eyes to know what was going on: Quark was using a vibrator to give himself oomox--less than a foot away from where Odo lay.

The procedure seemed to go on for an eternity. Odo tried not to flinch as Quark panted and moaned and gasped, "Yes ... oh, damn yes, that's good!" over and over like some grotesque porn-vid set to play in an endless loop. When Quark finally squealed through his climax, Odo shuddered in horror. After the moment had passed, he found to his shock that his pillow-self had tensed and even contracted somewhat. Probably trying to shut out the unpalatable noise of Quark's orgasm, he reflected sourly. Forcing himself to relax and smooth out his bunched-up contours, he continued to lie still, waiting for Quark to get up from the bed.

No such luck. Quark sat up and then knelt on the bed, grabbing a nearby pillow and then flinging it aside in frustration. He reached out again and Odo was startled to feel the Ferengi's hands on his body. Before Odo could move or even think, he felt himself being wrapped around a length of hard flesh and pressed between Quark's thighs. Gods no. This was not possible.

Nothing had prepared him for the possibility that Quark would put his innocent bedding to such a use, though, upon reflection, it really should have occurred to him, considering what a lecherous little toad Quark was. The Ferengi's cock became longer and harder as Quark pumped it into the depths of the bunched-up pillow that was not a pillow. Odo, now in full-contract with Quark's prick, was stunned at the size of the thing, and also at the way his own pleasure sensors reacted to Quark's vigorous pumping. For even reduced to something as simple as a bed-pillow, Odo was hyper-aware of touch.

Ripples of delicious friction radiated across Odo's surface and deep into his pillow-form. If he'd had vocal cords at the moment, he might well have given a little moan or gasp. As it was, he had to fight to hold his shape.

On it went, for several unbearable minutes, Quark thrusting with that huge, delicious cock right into Odo's bunched-up pillow-self, and Odo unable to react at all. Odo shivered. The tortures of Dr. Mora's lab, he decided, were nothing compared to this. He did not even want to imagine what might happen when the Ferengi reached another climax. Just hold the form, he told himself. Hold the form ... Odo concentrated on the thought, repeating it silently like a mantra. Quark began to pant and groan once more as his exertions went on.

"Oh ... profit ... this is ... amazing. This fabric is just like--Hey! What the ...?" Quark's thrusting stopped abruptly, and Odo felt the halt of Quark's motion everywhere in his being. Too late, he realized why this was. The portion of himself that was in actual contact with Quark's penis had formed itself into a kind of glove that fitted Quark perfectly--a soft glove of flesh which had begun, reflexively, to grip the Ferengi's cock in spasms. Odo had, in effect, shaped himself so that Quark could fuck him more effectively.

For a moment, Quark stared down at his pillow-wrapped penis in complete bewilderment. Then comprehension slowly dawned, and Odo trembled as his worst fears were realized. He was discovered.

"Odo?" Quark hissed suspiciously. "Odo--is that you?"

Odo had no idea what to do. The portion of him that was wrapped around Quark's prick was still humming with desperate arousal. How in hell could Quark know it was him? he wondered furiously. Then he answered his own question. Because bedding doesn't normally grab your penis when you masturbate. If he'd had legs at the moment he would have kicked himself. How could he have been such an idiot?

To his further shock, Quark broke into a decidedly evil chuckle. "So now the truth comes out, huh? I should've known you were after my body all along. All that obsessive lingering around my bar. So that's what you had on your mind, eh, Constable?"

Odo was determined not to dignify this--any of this--with a reply. He stubbornly remained a mute if embarrassed pillow. Yet Quark's erection--if it were possible, and evidently it was--seemed to grow even larger within the confines of the pocket he'd created. And Odo could feel it. And Odo suddenly longed desperately to writhe and rub himself all over Quark's magnificent prick. Don't, he told himself firmly, ... even think about it. Keep still.

Quark extended a finger experimentally to tickle the surface of his formerly innocent piece of bedding. "Come on out, Odo," he cooed. "Uncle Quark knows it's you. Hmmm ..." he pondered, "or maybe you just need some more ... encouragement."

Quark began to move his hips once more, this time with malicious purpose. Odo quivered but held out for three good hard thrusts--and then, his changeling reflexes began to take over. Odo tightened around the Ferengi's prick and shuddered all over. Slowly but surely, his self-control began to crumble at the onslaught of pleasure. He felt his shape twist and writhe as Quark pumped into him, until he had no choice, it seemed, but to dissolve utterly and reform without thought into the shape that he longed to be.

And so he found himself in humanoid form once more, gasping on his belly in the middle of Quark's bed--with the little Ferengi kneeling squarely between his thighs, his cock buried to the hilt in Odo's warm changeling flesh. Quark, evidently unfazed by Odo's shift in form, thrust delightedly once more. It felt ... wonderful. Odo moaned in rapture. He was astonished and mortified at the same time--but neither astonished nor mortified enough to ask Quark to stop. Quite the contrary.

"More!" Odo panted, now that he had a voice once again. Quark, obliging, rammed himself hard into the changeling's pulsing depths. Odo twisted in pleasure, grunting and clenching with his entire body as he felt the Ferengi's cock plunge deep. His liquid insides contracted around Quark possessively. "Harder!" he begged, his voice a breathless rasp, and Quark swung his hips forward yet again, driving his hard rod firmly between Odo's legs, deep into Odo's gooey center. Odo moaned again, tensing once more to grip and hold Quark within himself, trembling in every cell as he was fucked.

Quark, never one to disdain a lucky windfall from the Great Treasury, was by now in his own private heaven. Initially shocked to see Odo materialize in his bed, and nearly scandalized to find just how much he enjoyed fucking the constable, he had quickly set any reluctance aside and moved on to pure, lecherous enjoyment of the situation. His hips began to thrust now with abandon. His prick slid easily back and forth inside Odo's wondrous liquid cunt, which proved a near-perfect combination of heat, friction, and lubrication. Odo's walls fit his erection like a tailored glove, gripped like a firm hand, and sucked like a wet mouth all at once. It was exquisite. There was just one more thing that would make the experience perfect.

"Tell me to fuck you, Odo," Quark panted as he continued to shag Odo furiously from behind. "Say 'Fuck me, Quark!'"

Odo drew Quark's prick into himself with a deep groan and swirled his liquid substance around it, feeling, touching, tasting. Involuntarily, he ran the tip of his tongue over his own lips as he sensed the wetness seeping from the tip of the Ferengi's engorged prick. Odo moved his hips slowly, delighted beyond all measure when Quark's pudgy fingers slid underneath his belly to brace and stroke the insides of his own smooth thighs. The touch made him tingle all over.

"Say it," breathed the Ferengi. "Ask me to fuck you!"

Quark's hips bore slowly forward and down, forcing that marvelous, monstrous cock deeper into Odo's depths. Odo stretched himself wide and contracted greedily around Quark's long, gnarled, exquisite penis. The constable closed his eyes and let his hips roll, enjoying the force, the fullness, the sweet friction of having Quark inside him. The words spilled from his mouth as if he'd been saving them up.

"Fuck ... me ... Quark," Odo growled, low and soft, enunciating each word carefully. His plea was answered with another deep plunge of Quark's rod. "Aaaaaah ... yes," Odo groaned, arching, pushing his hips up to meet the thrust. Quark swung back and forth, slowly at first, then gradually harder and faster, ramming up Odo's backside as if he meant to churn the changeling's substance to butter. "Aaahh!" Odo rasped, "Harder!"--his voice somehow commanding and begging at the same time.

Quark's thrusts increased in speed and force. The Ferengi, primed for his own orgasm, pumped his hips mightily and gasped as he felt Odo's channel pulling and sucking him in. Odo clenched his jaw and locked trembling arms and legs against the rising force of Quark's thrusts, emitting little grunts at each push of Quark's hips. The hot changeling substance inside him squeezed and caressed Quark's prick with ravenous hunger. Hunger. Yes. He knew what that was now.

When the hot blast of Quark's semen shot through Odo's liquid substance, it was like a comet tearing across the changeling's pleasure sensors. Odo swore loudly in Bajoran as Quark spilled into his depths, reflexively gripping the Ferengi's prick in spasm after uncontrollable spasm. It was quite some time before they were able to stop and catch their breath. When they finally did pause in their exertions, they were still joined together. Odo lay sprawled on the bed, far more relaxed now than his pillow-self had been, so sated with pleasure that he'd almost forgotten what he'd originally come to Quark's rooms for. "That was ... amazing!" the constable sighed, lolling on his stomach amid the now hopelessly tangled bedding, his eyes closed in bliss.

"No need to thank me or anything," grinned Quark, still buried deep in the warm, silky changeling flesh, and feeling rather pleasantly fluid himself . "But something tells me ..." He thrust just slightly again, felt Odo contract and then relax with a sigh. "... that you weren't hiding out in my quarters waiting to give me a present ..."

"What of it?" Odo growled. He let his substance begin a low-level thrumming around the Ferengi's cock, squeezing delicately. Quark gave a whimper and another tiny thrust and Odo growled in deep pleasure.

"It just ... seems to me ..." grunted Quark. "That if you and I are going to ... enjoy each other. You might think about ... doing me ... a favor ... or two ..."

Odo's voice hardened, even as he tensed once more around Quark's erection. "Are you offering me a bribe, Quark?"

"Bribe?" Quark sounded scandalized. "By the Great Treasury, no. I'm offering you ..." Odo grunted softly at another gentle thrust that made all his pleasure receptors tingle. "I'm offering you ... an opportunity." More thrusts. Tiny bursts of pleasure all along Odo's spine. His liquid insides swirled around Quark's thick cock, drawing it up into his body almost as if swallowing. Quark gave a little gasp, but pressed on with his speech. "I'm offering you pleasure, Odo. All the pleasure you want ...."

Odo closed his eyes. Nothing in his whole life had ever felt so good as the Ferengi's warm hard length within him. He let himself concentrate, stroking Quark in a gentle, liquid rhythm, until the Ferengi began to keen softly and then to thrust harder, panting.

"And just who is giving who pleasure here?" rasped Odo, teasing, enjoying both the physical sensation and the feeling of control.
"I would say ..." panted Quark. "That it's ... mutual ... Constable. Besides ..." And here the Ferengi abruptly stopped thrusting himself into Odo's backside. "You never know whether or not I might have some holo-recorders running in here ..."

Odo froze. The Ferengi could be bluffing. Then again, he had been planning to bring a Dabo girl up here. It made a certain perverse sense that he might have planned to make a recording of her. He'd tried before to make a recording of Major Kira for the use of one of his customers. Electronic snooping devices and recorders could be hidden just about anywhere, and easily activated surreptitiously--as Odo knew quite well himself. He was forced to concede that, in the words of an ancient human expression, Quark had him by the balls.

Odo tore himself free of the Ferengi's now-offending penis and sat up on the bed, glaring into Quark's smilingly lecherous expression. "As I always say, Constable," the Ferengi continued, as if nothing at all had just happened, "Why bribe ...?"

"When you can blackmail?" Odo finished for him, folding his arms across his chest. "And what Rule of Acquisition would that be?"

Quark looked affronted. "That would be 'Quark's Rule Number One for Dealing with Nosey Constables.' Nosey, sexy, shapeshifting constables with really great asses, that is." He looked Odo's still naked-appearing body pointedly up and down.

Odo fumed silently, furious with Quark, but even more furious with himself. He, of all people-letting his ... 'coupling-urges' lead him into one of Quark's duplicitous little schemes. Any green security recruit would have known better.

"Oh, come on now, Odo," wheedled Quark. "It's not so bad. I'm sure we can work out a suitable ... arrangement."

Odo snorted. "If you think I'm going to pay you for your ... services ..." he began, his voice heavy with disgust.

"I'm nobody's whore!" sniffed Quark. "All I want from you is a promise not to ... disclose some of my business practices. And in return, I won't disclose some of your ... personal practices. And of course, we could continue ... amusing each other." The Ferengi offered hopefully. His tone of voice made the sulking Odo look up into Quark's toothy grin. "Who could object to such an exchange of ... favors?" Quark asked reasonably. "It's a win-win situation." He promised.

Odo looked at him dubiously. His eye was drawn to the juncture of Quark's thighs, where, unbelievably, the Ferengi's cock was beginning to rouse itself again. It figured, Odo thought wryly, that closing an illegal business deal would give Quark a hard-on. On the other hand ... given the excuse to linger in Quark's bedroom for long periods of time, perhaps even while the Ferengi slept ... who knew what sort of evidence Odo might eventually be able to discover? It was indeed an opportunity too good to pass up, he decided.

Odo gave a non-committal grunt. "Why don't you show me what you have in mind," he growled, looking Quark squarely in the eye. Wordlessly, he formed an erection of his own, so that Quark couldn't help but take notice of it.

Quark beamed. "With pleasure, Constable," he purred. Moments later, he had grabbed Odo's prick with both hands and was sucking it avidly. Odo fell back amid the tangled bedding with a groan. Quark's pointed teeth caused tiny, sharp tingles of pleasure as they scraped over his constructed genitals. Odo closed his eyes and let his hands find the Ferengi's ears. He could easily outlast Quark in bed, he told himself. As soon as the Ferengi drifted into sleep, Odo would have all the time he needed to search these quarters from top to bottom for evidence of criminal activity. Oh yes. Odo moaned and thrust into Quark's hot mouth. Oh yes indeed. All the time he needed to get that damned Ferengi right where he wanted him ....

~the end?~

Author's Notes: A story challenge on ASCEM was just the spur I needed to finish a piece that had been lurking on my hard-drive for most of a couple of months. Partial inspiration to finish this story also came from a hilarious J. Juls Garak/Bashir piece on ASCEM featuring Odo-as-bedsheet. My thanks also to Quark himself, who has in many ways become my personal muse of smut. This story was posted to ASCEM in June of 2003, and to my astonishment, received an honorable mention in the ASCEM GO Awards that year in the DS9 "Other Slash" catagory. My thanks to those who read and voted for this twisted little story about my favorite slash pairing.